LADY PAMELA

On page 141 of Vamps and the City, Darcy interviews each of the five harem ladies. The interviews were later edited into the reality show. Lady Pamela’s interview was scheduled to appear in the second show when she judged the men on their manners in the greenhouse (page 183).

Darcy: Pamela, could you please tell us about yourself?

Pamela: That’s Lady Pamela to you. Lady Pamela Smythe-Worthing. I was born in 1796 in Dorset. My mother died of fever when I was quite young. My father, Baron Ruxton, was a wonderful man. He doted on me, naturally. When I was eighteen, he spent a fortune on my first season. I was giddy with excitement. I absolutely adored all the balls and plays and beautiful gowns. I wanted it to never end.

After only a few weeks, I caught the eye of a very handsome viscount. Maxmillian Smythe-Worthing. He was quite the catch. The other girls were so envious. The rumor mill had it that he’d been looking for a wife for years. I didn’t believe such nonsense, for he looked rather young to me. As for the other rumor--that he had a dark, mysterious secret life--posh! It was nothing but the wagging tongues of jealous women.

Maxmillian insisted on a short engagement, so soon we were wed. He was quite...wonderful in every way. We went to all the events, making merry from dusk to dawn. I was deliriously happy. Then, Max asked me if I would like to stay young and beautiful forever. Would I like to spend an eternity wearing beautiful gowns and going to lovely parties? I said yes, of course. I didn’t quite understand what he meant until after he...transformed me. I was a bit peeved by it all, but as long as Max was by my side, I was content.

My father had heard the rumors about Max and began to suspect. He wanted to hire an artist to do my portrait, and of course, I agreed. I had a lovely new gown I wanted to show off. When the portrait was done, my father held a small soirée in my honor. My portrait was in the parlor, covered by a velvet cloth. My father asked Max and I to stand in front of it for the unveiling. He whisked off the velvet, and the portrait wasn’t there. It was a large mirror.

Everyone gasped, for Max and I were not reflected. Father shouted at the men, and they lunged forward to seize my husband. Max grabbed me, and we vanished from the room as vampires do.

The next few years were very trying. We had to go into hiding. There were no parties, no dancing, no one to see my beautiful new gowns. Then one evening, when I awoke in that dreadful cellar in Cornwall where we were hiding, I discovered my beloved Max had been murdered during the day. The horrid stake was still there amongst his ashes. And my father’s ring was there, so I would know it was he who had killed Max.

I was most dreadfully overset. I appealed to the coven master of England, and he took me into his harem. Max had been a dear friend, so the master vowed to avenge my husband’s murder. As angry as I was with my father, I couldn’t bear to lose him, too. So, I visited him one night and begged him to flee to America. He did, and I never saw him again.

The years went by. In the 1940’s, during the Second Great Mortal War, bombs were falling on London. We took shelter underground, but we feared the bombs would destroy our lair or expose it to the sun. Then, the mortals began hiding underground, too. We feared they would discover us and kill us while we slept. So, a great number of us moved to America. I joined the harem of the coven master of the East Coast Vampires.

I believe I am finally becoming something of an American. It seems fitting that I should have the right to choose my own master. And that’s what I plan to do from now on.